Residence: One giant cesspool of human interaction

A warning to first-year students

Content image

Photo courtesy of il_Morta on Flickr

Photo courtesy of il_Morta on Flickr

Residence has its upsides. You have a built-in social life, easy access to parties and somebody in your dorm is bound to have an Xbox. But here’s what else you have to look forward to:

1) You and your roommate aren’t just sharing a room.

You’re also sharing your food. And your toilet paper. And your toothbrush. Maybe in theory you don’t mind sharing your sleeping quarters and bathrooms with a complete stranger. But here’s the question that you need to ask yourself: will it bother you that Mr. Toothbrush is right next to Mr. Toilet? Every time they flush, your brush is in the blast radius. The lesson? Guard it closely.

2) 24-7 parties aren’t always a good thing.

You know what’s worse than going to a party instead of finishing a lab report or term paper? Trying to finish a lab report or term paper while there’s a party going on next door. You end up suffering all the drawbacks of going to a party, without actually enjoying the party. The lesson? Familiarize yourself with the library and find out if your residence has a quiet study area.

3) You’ll make lots of friends in residence.

You’re probably wondering how this can be a bad thing, right?  The problem is, in residence you’re mixing stuff together that shouldn’t be mixed together; your social life, sleeping quarters, and work space are all mashed together in one giant cesspool of human interaction. Just remember kids. Enjoy it — but not too much. All play and no work makes Jack a dropout. You may not remember tonight’s party (even if you go), but you will remember if you fail out of school. Sweet dreams!