Is your industry a) strategic, b) high-tech, c) no-hope, but located in swing ridings an hour’s drive from a major media centre, d) whatever will get me a grant

But, you ask, where’s my stimulus? Where’s my bailout? 

Stop it. I hate it when you use your Mr. Whiney voice. And in any event, it’s a perfectly simple procedure. Just fill out this form. And send it along to the good people at Stimulus Canada.