Getting dressed
By all means: Put on your pants. Even if you’re not ready for non-stretch fabric.
Avoid: The T-shirt you have worn daily since March 2020 (unless freshly laundered).
Greeting strangers
Do: Move your hand from side to side in a waving motion.
Don’t: Lunge forward for a hug, stare slack-jawed or frown in obvious discomfort.
Small talk
Please: Maintain eye contact. Raise the corners of your mouth in a “smile.”
Thank you for not: Breathing heavily. Segueing from the weather to your new-found nihilism.
Meetings
Thumbs-up: Remember you are no longer required to unmute yourself before speaking.
Thumbs down: Not paying attention. Everyone can see your “off-camera” texting.
Coffee runs
Kindly: Ask your office mates if they want anything. Tip the barista generously.
Kindly stop: Holding up the line as you gawk at the menu and try to recall which one is “venti.”
Happy hour
Remember: Befriend the bartender. Take in the classic dive-bar smell. Laugh. It’s okay to laugh.
But: Keep your shoes on and feet off the table. Because—at long last!—you’re not at home.
(Illustrations by Marie-Danielle Smith)
