Andy Griffith Show

You wouldn’t want to cross either one, That’s how it’s done in Wawota, Sask. and Andy, Andy, we got us a crime wave!

Of all the TV theme songs that have secret lyrics — lyrics that were never used on the show — I think the best set of lyrics may be the ones for the Andy Griffith Show theme. (Even better than “The X-Files is a show/With music by Mark Snow.”) The words were supplied by the veteran actor Everett Sloane, best known as the guy who gets the best speech in Citizen Kane, and while they were never sung on the show, Griffith recorded them. (One of the main reasons for writing lyrics to an instrumental theme was, of course, so that that vocalists could record them, or the star of the show could include them on an album.) They fit the atmosphere and style of the show so perfectly that they actually enhance the theme music by telling us more of what it’s about, instead of sounding redundant like many theme song lyrics.

You may have already seen Ron Howard’s mega-celebrity endorsement video, but here it is again. As to what I mean by the subject heading: Andy Taylor is a sheriff who constantly violates or stretches the letter of the law to let dangerous criminals like Otis off the hook, and he’s a liberal ACLU squish to boot. And the Fonz, well, that speaks for itself. This guy’s endorsement would not seem to be helpful. (Though he did endorse Eisenhower in one episode. “I like Ike, my bike likes Ike.” So maybe he has his finger on the pulse of the nation, and he has some claims to being bipartisan.)