excessive eyebrow references

Welcome to the Monday Mailbag on Tuesday, where at the time of this posting the list of top terms people use to arrive at Macleans.ca via search engines – a list that is usually dominated by the names Paul Wells, Andrew Coyne and Kady O’Malley – stands as follows:

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I know this is your opportunity to ask me questions, but I have to inquire: What is the deal with you people? You realize there are other pretty ladies on the Internet, right? If you go look right now you might even catch some of them before they put their tops back on. Alternately, one must ask the question: how many different ISPs can Peter MacKay have at his disposal?

On to the mailbag. As ever, these are actual questions actually submitted by actual readers.

Dear Mr. Feschuk: What “Lord of the Rings” character is Iggy most like? Gandalf — with the you-know-what’s? Aragorn — steely gaze, noble background, arrives from abroad, destiny, etc.? Boromir — tempted by the Ring? – Jack Mitchell, Toronto

Dear Jack –

Come on, Jack. What a ridiculous question. This is the Leader of Her Majesty’s Official Opposition we’re talking about. You don’t go comparing the Leader of Her Majesty’s Official Opposition to some fictional midgets with hairy feet – not until 2011 when Jim Flaherty has the job, anyway. And you don’t compare him to wizards or elves or dwarves. Especially when it’s totally obvious that he’s much more like Sam the Eagle from The Muppet Show.