Don’t worry – Stephen Harper knows how to take care of this deficit problem

Coming soon to a TV channel near you:

[Ominous music. Images of piles of money.]

The federal deficit.

First it looked like it was going to be $34-billion.

Now it looks like it’s going to be $50-billion.

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Why can’t it make up its mind?

Why is it flip-flopping like that?

[Abrupt silence. Dramatic pause.]

What is it hiding?

And where’s it been for the last 10 years?

[Music resumes. We see a photograph of the piles of money having martinis with Al Capone, Hitler and Dr. Doom.]

Do you know where the deficit likes to spend its time?

In China. With Chinese bankers who don’t even live in Canada.

[Artist’s crude drawing of a little girl weeping over the lifeless body of her kitty-cat.]

Also, it looks like the deficit might possibly have just killed this girl’s cat maybe.

That’s just sick.

The federal deficit: It’s just in it for itself.