You’re Not Alone: The Truth About Male Incontinence

Even Dr. Francis Davoine can struggle to talk about his personal experience with incontinence—and the involuntary leaks that come with it. “I’m used to it,” says Davoine, the director-at-large for the Canadian Continence Foundation and immunology professor at the University of Alberta. “But it’s not always easy.”

Davoine is far from alone. According to data from MarketVision in conjunction with TENA Men—a global leader in incontinence care products, including guards, shields and underwear—20 million men in North America experience drips and dribbles, yet only two per cent open up about it with doctors or others in their lives. The vast majority (72 per cent) believe male incontinence is uncommon and that they are exceptions, which only deepens feelings of isolation.

Davoine knows that feeling well. He has managed urinary incontinence since his thirties, following a surgery to treat his Crohn’s disease. His experience is not unique. While incontinence can occur without any health-related issues, it can arise from many factors, including aging, prostate enlargement, nerve damage, surgery or as the result of certain medications or allergies, all of which can disrupt how the bladder and muscles control urine flow. 

Despite this constant, silent challenge, Davoine leads an active life. He is a father of four, an academic, a triathlete and a skier who spends much of his time outdoors. To stay active without worry, he wears protective incontinence underwear—a discreet way to prevent leaks and avoid being caught unprepared. “For me, it’s the only way to be active. Otherwise, I would be stuck at home all the time,” he says.

Still, even with effective solutions, the stigma remains.

“There’s a taboo. You don’t talk about how you pee,” Davoine says. “But it’s normal.”

Break the stigma-driven silence

Incontinence is surprisingly common in men. According to MarketVision research in conjunction with TENA Men, one in four men over 40 experience some form of urinary leakage, and a third report drips and dribbles. Yet many experience it in silence, often with profound impacts on mental health.

“Many people will not go out in public. They won’t take public transportation for fear of not being able to access a bathroom. They decrease their social interaction,” says Dr. Dean Elterman, a urologic surgeon and professor at the University of Toronto. “There’s a high correlation between patients who have overactive bladders and incontinence and incidents of depression and anxiety.” 

The first step to breaking the stigma is understanding what incontinence is—and how to manage it.

“Adults have a bladder of about 300 to 500 millilitres,” says Elterman. “Once your bladder is full, it sends a signal to your brain saying, ‘Hey, I think we should find a bathroom pretty soon.’” 

He describes two common types of incontinence: stress incontinence, where physical pressure such as coughing or sneezing strains the bladder and causes leaks, and urge incontinence, caused by an overactive bladder that contracts suddenly, triggering an urgent need to go before you can reach a bathroom.

He describes two common types: stress incontinence, where physical pressure such as coughing or sneezing strains the bladder and causes leaks, and urge incontinence, caused by an overactive bladder that contracts suddenly, triggering an urgent need to go before you can reach a bathroom.

Elterman advises anyone noticing changes in their bathroom habits—a slow stream, frequent urination or waking at night—to consult their family doctor.

Solutions to keep men feeling comfortable and confident

“This is a treatable medical condition,” he says. “There should not be a stigma about having small accidents and having to pee more often at night. It’s very common, and it happens more frequently as we get older.”

For Davoine, TENA Men guards, shields and protective underwear have made urinary incontinence a manageable part of daily life. He encourages other men facing similar challenges to explore these solutions.

Finding a support network is equally important. “Connecting with others and knowing that you’re not the only one really helps,” he says.

Another piece of advice Davoine offers—and is challenging himself to do—is to share your story to normalize the condition and break the stigma. “Incontinence is a medical condition,” he says. “If you have a broken ankle, you use crutches. For my bladder, absorbent products for adults are like crutches. It’s a medical device designed to improve your quality of life, so you don’t have to be ashamed.”

If you or someone you know is living with incontinence, remember that it doesn’t mean retreating from life. With medical support and discreet products like TENA Men protective shields, guards and underwear, you can manage leaks confidently and get back to the activities you love, worry-free.