hugh hefner's weary penis
playboy’s finances: soft, limp – are you getting the comparative image I am trying to evoke? – drooping, flaccid, a non-erect penis…
It has been revealed that Playboy is losing money. Playboy! You might ask yourself: how does a company lose a million dollars a month publishing pictures of buck-naked ladies? Did futures contracts for crotchless underwear abruptly skyrocket? Has the shady cartel controlling the production of silicone gel ruthlessly scaled back implant production? Did Charlie Sheen allow his 2,000 subscriptions to lapse?
“remind me – which naked lady is your daughter again?”
So what we’ve got in this here photograph is Playboy’s Playmate of the Year, Jayde Nicole of Port Perry, Ont. She’s the one wearing the Playboy rabbit necklace and, disappointingly, clothes.