Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton said yesterday that she has something in common with legendary film boxer Rocky Balboa – she’s not a quitter. Other things Hillary has in common with Rocky:
• She begins each and every day by repeatedly punching the frozen carcass of Dennis Kucinich.
• Has been steadily wearing out welcome among American public since 1976.
• Those huge manly biceps.
• Once spent 45 minutes locked in a sweaty embrace with Mr. T, if you catch my drift.
• Every time she’s introduced, insists on removing silk robe to reveal shirtlessness.
• His nickname: The Italian Stallion. Her nickname: The Whatever Heritage Will Make You More Likely to Vote for Me/Whatever Animal You Like Most. (ex. When speaking to little girls, she’s The Irish Pony!)
• Uncanny resemblance between James Carville and Burgess Meredith.
• She’s engaged in bitter rivalry with a charismatic black man who will ultimately be punched to death by Dolph Lundgren – assuming Dolph returns her calls and needs the money.
• Not only triumphantly climbed steps of Philadelphia Museum of Art, but did so under sniper fire.
• Just like Rocky, she will overcome adversity, rise to the challenge and… lose to her superior African-American rival. (Hmm, maybe she should have watched to the end of the DVD before making this comparison…)